I pity English students these days. I pity them very much. Or, I should not have pity for them. Who sent them to study something like syntax in the first place. Or semantics. By Jupiter, space scientists like Stephen Hawkings, the briefest astronomer in the universe, would damn it. But I pity lexicographers the more. They, like the grammar students are doomed to the same fate. Like Achilles who was destined to die in battle. May the grammarians not perish by their heels.Because they are helping us to understand the meanings of words and how to use them. Like "mental mistake" (which mistake is not mental anyway?) And "peel-and-eat-shrimp" (so that we do not peel the shrimps and throw them on the floor). They should be in our mouths. The world of unlettered men are eternally grateful to the grammarians. For we would have starved to death. T.R. Malthus forgot to PTFE bush mention how they would influence the world's demography in his theory of population by remembering us to eat. Poor visioner. And thumbs up for the grammarians!Because they are now going to help us understand the U.S election. They will tell us that George Bush Jr. is the Republican candidate for the November election. They will tell us that John Kerry, no, Bob Kerry sounds better. They will tell us that Bob Kerry is the flag bearer for the Democrats. But since he will not be carrying a physical flag, let's call him the Democratic presidential hopeful. I like the last word. Especially when pronounced with a stress in the last syllable and accompanied by a look toward the golden gates of heaven. Like a saint homeward bound. I like the word because it takes the oration of Demosthenes, the wisdom of Solomon, the insight of Hecate, and the hand of Maradonna, sorry, the ‘hand of God,' to remove an incumbent.But what is electability? nThat is not an easy questio. It is like asking: What is ‘weapon of mass destruction?' Or what is ‘undisclosed secret location?' The lexicographers haven't added those to the dictionary yet. But just in case you can't wait, I will give you references. For ‘weapon of mass destruction,' ask George Bush. For ‘undisclosed secret location,' find out from the vee pee, Dick Cheney. (Or has he been fired?) We will also hear political statements like these: "I stand on the ground and say that I will not raise taxes" (as if he was suspended 1,000 feet in the air or 1,000 fathoms beneath the Atlantic Ocean). "The greatest challenge facing the world in this century is terrorism" (that means it is not a problem, only a challenge). "If elected, I will wipe out reverse discrimination in America" (which discrimination is inverse?)
