" One day I was looking at the red flower patterns of the tablecloth on a table, and when I looked up I saw the same pattern covering the ceiling, the windows and the walls, and finally all over the room, my body and the universe. I felt as if I had begun to self-obliterate, to revolve in the infinity of endless time and the absoluteness of space, and be reduced to nothingness. As I realized it was actually happening and not just in my imagination, I was frightened. I knew I had to run away lest I should be deprived of my life by the spell of the red flowers. I ran desperately up the stairs. The steps below me began to fall apart and I fell down the stairs straining my ankle.’ – Yayoi Kusama. It is the first time that Kusama saw the hallucination. She channelled this experience into a philosophy of ‘self-obliteration’ where being overwhelmed is a celebratory choice, not a feverish ordeal. Kusama has sought to cover the world in dots. In her 1968 film Kusama’s Self-Obliteration she is seen painting dots on many objects. She stuck many polka dots on the her own body and the horse one by one. Then, she rode on the horse and walk around with the polka dots. She also got in the the lake, and painted polka dots on the canvas which floated on the lake. Besides, she used colors to put the polka dots floating on the lake. In the film, she even applied polka dots on the naked body, trees, landscapes and the cat. Finally, the film ended with the people who were painted polka dots on their naked bodies were superimposing each other and blended with the background. 點擊圖片放大 +2 Kusama uses polka dots to cover and conceal people, animals, the environment, and everything around. It is a metaphor of giving up identity, abolishing uniqueness, and becoming one with the universe–or “self-obliteration.” You can watch the film in this link: Kusama's Self-Obliteration (Jud Yalkut, 1967)
